he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize