I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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