if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
