Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
