Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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