Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
