Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize
