Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize