this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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