he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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