First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I would fuck him just for his dog
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
