Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize