instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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