She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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