just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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