Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
