I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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