o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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