She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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