I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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