i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
