I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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