i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
