i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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