if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
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