i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
