Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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