I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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