My boss' voice literally gives me gas
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
