I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize