i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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