I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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