White coat. Heels.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
