this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
