Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
