Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Sorry about my life...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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