I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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