I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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