ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Randomize
