my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
