the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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