what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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