I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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