My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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