well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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