She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
