We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
