i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
