like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Randomize