I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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