I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
