My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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